i need to help myself.

Ok. I’m going back to school on Sunday or Tuesday.

My plan is to go directly to the bosses and just be like, “Ok. You guys know this is extraordinarily stressful for me and you know the reasons. You also know that I can’t keep my mouth shut. So. My proposal is for me to have something to focus on in class times so I don’t blow up. There are four options: Origami, drawing/coloring, journaling, or music.  I need something tangible and visible to keep me from exploding, which you know. I cannot ignore and I cannot keep my thoughts to myself. Please, help me help you to help everyone by distracting myself.  I can contribute and listen but I need to have something visible and tangible to hold my focus and keep my mouth shut. If you want me to keep my mouth shut let me focus on something in front of my face.”

Something like that. Well, not really, I was just adding on as I went.  They need to let me do something.  And I need my phone for the drawing and origami.  If they don’t let me do it, then we all know how it’s gonna end.

That’s my proposal. I really have no idea how it’s gonna go over, but I’m gonna try to make it seem professional and adult. If you can help with this, please do.

Ohhh, ya know what I just thought of?? duh. Hello dummy!!!! I should call my DOHRs councilor! She’ll tell them. And get it across. Well, I don’t know. But it’s an option for help. beh….

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One thought on “i need to help myself.

  1. stephypowers

    I’d try contacting the counselor and telling them directly how you feel it will help you avoid having ‘explosions’. I get extremely busy in January, May, and September to avoid myself from getting depressed. (January 18 is my brother’s birthday, May 21 is the day of the accident that killed both my brother and high school sweetheart, and September 11 is my high school sweetheart’s birthday…)

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