back to boringville

It seems like so long ago, but yes, I was suspended. Because I got an attitude with THE big boss. That was it, really. I don’t mind. I get my mommy, doggy and bed. woop! Mom and I talked and I’m quitting. We go to get my stuff later on. I get healthy meals and no stupidity. The question now is What am I gonna do?? I really have no fucking idea.I can go back to Head Start for now, but what if they have no openings? I’ll have to find out first.

Meanwhile, mom is filling out a bigass application form for me to live a group home in my hometown. Fabulous. I adore my hometown.

I can’t live by myself. I can’t live with my mom and she can’t live with me. I can’t live with my dad. I can’t live with my sisters. and I can’t live with just anybody. Dude, I don’t know what to do. I’m not allowed to make friends. My first experience with a group home was shit. I’m not doing it. But mom SAYS that these new people will be on my level of function. She also says there’s only 6 people. I’m not worried about them liking me, I’m worried about me liking them. I guess we’ll have to meet these people and figure it out then. She says NC has a lot more funds to support this thing so it’ll be nicer.

I will drive eventually. Right now, there’s no way I could pay for a car or drive it. John is spread over so many clients and the anxiety will only go away through constant repetition. He can’t be with me 24/7. A week and a half won’t be enough. So I just quit. Everyone agrees that I can’t live alone, and I do too. So that’s not news.

What a waste of time. Still, I did learn a bit, met Danielle-who I may move in with-, and what would I have been doing with my life otherwise?

Still, it was a waste.The pros do not outweigh the cons here.

But the question remains. What now? Jesus. I don’t know.

On to other matters. Well, this may have been a mistake. I don’t know yet. I met a guy over OKCupid. Same way I met Chris. We invited him over to the house to meet mom and Bob. Nothing happened AT ALL. We just sat there all nervous like idiots. Fine, I suppose. I don’t see anything wrong with him yet, but nothing’s right either. He’s just bleh. I don’t want a bleh person. He’s sweet, for sure. But just bleh. It only counts for like a fourth of a point.

Guess that’s really it. Oh, I’m doing really well in Italian now. I can translate 50-70% of what I read. Yeay. Pronunciation is my strong point. But I can’t say or write any without being asked to translate.

I’m just….so done with my life. Can I return it and get a new one??-.-

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One thought on “back to boringville

  1. stephypowers

    I know the feeling. I say give the house a chance. I hope it will be better for you. I’m not driving yet either, but I’m going to try to get a new permit/license before my current one expires. I just need a doctor to take off the medical thing. Maybe the guy was nervous in front of your mom and Bob.

    Like

    Reply

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