Rape dream interpretation???

Hi. It’s 4am now. I just woke up. and I’m so confused.

Ok. A few weeks ago, or maybe a month, I had this dream. I was in a lecture hall saying I was raped I knew I wasn’t. The explanation, in the dream, was that I was late.

Then tonight, it continued. There were no students and no hall. I don’t know who I was explaining to. I was telling that it was a lie. didn’t apologize, but said i wanted to know the psychology behind rape. There were emotional responses. If I was telling no one, ….what???

In the first dream, I had given out a sheet of paper that was obviously my writing and the only number on it, was the number for my inhaler. (I don’t know the actual number), and I had given it as the number of someone else’s inhaler. Why? I have no fucking clue. What do inhalers have to do with this??

I know people have continuing dreams. So it’s not wierd. This has happened before. And I know that what was on my brain that night was clearly the psychology of rape.  I have no idea how the inhaler came into it though. But my question is, #1 why would I lie about rape?? That’s not something I would do. Perhaps, I wondered how things would go and I just played out a scene?? #2 Why did this continue after a few weeks or a month?? People with continuing dreams usually have them consecutively, don’t they? Now that I think of it, there were no dreams in between.  Maybe my brain had to just press pause until it could think of the rest?? and what about that paper with the numbers??? well, it was the inhaler, then just lines and scribbles to indicate that there were more numbers. in red ink. Why is it red ink? why does that stick out of this?? and why was I telling that it was a lie?? When I do carry off a lie(which is totally rare.), i do tell the truth about it later. but why would i tell that a rape was a lie??? That’s not me at all. I mean, I would never lie about rape in the first place. Why would I even think about it??

And In this dram, I woke myself up by talking about how the whole thing was a lie and I wanted to know why it’s ok in the mind of the person doing it. I’ve woken myself by talking before. Not…making sound, but…in the midst of talking I’ll wake with my hand to my face, thinking it’s a phone. But I wasn’t on the phone this time. I was just talking. If it’s not sound, then why do I wake?? and i don’t stop talking either. I mean, i bet it’s mumbles and moans, but when I fully form words, it’s actually the thing I’m saying in the dream. then I catch on and stop. Now, I don’t even recall what I was saying. I remember “the psychology of rape” was in it though. Also I’ve never dreamed about how a scene would play out, OR about something as important as rape. My dreams are usually just silly little things. They don’t mean anything. What is my brain telling me with dreaming about lying then explaining the lie about rape?? There’s rarely a time when my dream means something. and even then, it’s not something like rape. What is my brain telling me with this????

And the first thing I do is get on wordpress to type it out. hmmm….maybe I needed to see this whole thing written out to make sense of it. But there is no sense about it!! But yes, that does make sense. lol 🙂

Maybe I’m telling me to go into the study of rape psychology. Or it could be just a dream, like any other. But the thing is, I never dream of anything as significant as rape. EVER.  why now? what’s going on in there??? what are you telling me here?? I’ve never even dreamed about my dad. what are you saying, brain??!! tell me!!!! in some way that I can get. Don’t be all confusing. You’re a meanie. thbbbbt. I’m not talking to you. lol

make sense, damnit.

and you know I can’t go into psychology. The testing said so, sure. but…I can’t do school. You know that. Meanie butt. How dare you push my dreams….literally. And figuratively. thhbbt.

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