i was ridiculed.

My 50th post!

last week sometime, i was looking for someone to just chat with on Gaiaonline. I saw a thread labeled “looking for a GF” or something of that nature. I went in there and it was practically a blank post. It had nothing about this guy. I snorted and just started questioning his age. He refused to tell me and that got me in asshole mode, I guess. While we were having our asshole battle, I started up another thread. In the beginning post, I said I was special needs, my age and such.  My assumption is he read that and started being a straight ass to me. It was not in good fun anymore from his end.

I mean, I didn’t curse at him, but I was a polite and respectful asshole. Which is still an ass. He made fun of me living with my mom. No where did I say I lived with my mother. It was not on my profile. My profile says, “my life centers around my dog, cat and mom.” While it is true, it’s rude that he assumed and even more rude that he didn’t ask why or any of that. And he starts going on about money and how he drives a Porsche Boxter. Which is what my dad has. So that’s how I know what it is.

For my part, I was just asking his age and other then money, what was the anty. Then he starts getting nasty. and just making fun.

I never said I LIVED with my mom. I do. but I never said it anywhere in that conversation or on my profile.  He only learned I am special needs through the new thread I started. I never said it to him. He clearly checked my profile. Which is absolutely fine. It’s what I typed it there for. He didn’t have anything on his profile.

I just don’t understand how a person can’t even be curious when they read/hear of a thing like that. Look, man. We are currently having an asshole battle, so clearly I can type and keep up with this shit you’re throwing me and can give it back.  It never occurred to this person to simply ask. Ridicule was the option he went for.  It baffles me.

Oh, and ya know what? before the asshole battle even began, he started deleting my posts from his thread because I was constantly asking for his age.  And THEN goes on to say that he’s going to not answer back “if i don’t fit the standard..” I comment back saying something like, “Tip: if you don’t want a person to reply to your post, don’t open fire at them. and you don’t have much of a standard honey.”  I got tipped for that post before it got deleted. I was calm but still having some assholeish fun. But then it turned nasty and I didn’t lead it there in any way. I was not nasty towards him.

It just hurts because someone who is at least somewhere near my age just chooses to be straight nasty about something I have no control over. How can a person be that way?? How can he not be even the slightest bit curious?? Did I say I lived with my mom? no. I said my life centers around her. You’re not curious as to why I say this and can clearly keep up with an asshole battle??? Also I know the image that was in his head. I could almost see it through the screen. The instant he read that I was special needs, the battle completely changed from fun and somewhat silly asshole battle into “YOU MUST CRY AND FEEL WORTHLESS BECAUSE YOU LIVE HOW YOU DO!!! HAHAHAHA!!” meaniehead battle.

No, this does not make me what to not say I’m this way. On the contrary, people. I want people to understand this is how it goes when people get the slightest information that I am mentally handicapped. Even though I clearly could keep up with his remarks beforehand, ………………….o_O…… This makes me want to stand up for myself more.

I want him and all out there like him, to be at least a little sensitive. You don’t have to go to extremes, but……don’t turn a simple little fun game thing into a meaniehead battle for who gets the right to live.

I have tried to contact him, but I am on the ignore list. I know what people will say. and I know these things.  I’m better then this and I shouldn’t pay attention and blah blah.  It’s the fact that he went straight for the ridicule option rather then another that gets me.  It makes me really depressed that people…are like that. They just are. And they don’t see the option of being curious.

I’m not saying everyone with a TBI or other injury/illness/ thing… is like me.  But if you simply ask people will tell you.  This hurts on a much more passionate level then just insults. Just ask. Don’t go directly to ridicule. You won’t collect $200. If you simply ask me what my problems are and not assume…..then you’ll get so much more then $200. Friendship is magic, dude. It absolutely is.

I asked Danielle what it’s like to have CP. She wasn’t offended or confused in the slightest. She just rattled it off. I got in her wheelchair and tried it out. She just sat there and laughed at me. 🙂

It’s not offensive to be curious, guys. Some people go on instant defense, but that’s them. Ya know, we, as a population, have a lot to go through; accepting, and accepting and accepting that others won’t accept. It’s really not easy to go through all that. Curiosity may have killed the cat, but others who watched and lived with the cat and listened are more intelligent.

ANYONE who is an individual with special needs wants friends. I swear it. Now I’m not gonna say there aren’t exceptions, but …..don’t go straight to the ridicule option. That won’t make your life better or our life worse.

For all things dear and good, just ask.

At the end of it, our last comments were: “Have fun being ‘special needs’XD”…or something equally fueling. Me: “Actually, I am right now.” At the time, it was past midnight.